Thursday, February 27, 2014
#429
Sian. Everything is just so sian right now.Research congress, Nanao poster, AP exams (can't decide if i should take!!) and ALL THE FREAKING PROJECTS THAT WE HAVEN'T STARTED ON (...)
So we got graded by Mr Murali for research congress. Okay it was bad but at least he gave good feedback. I have to redo the poster now though. D:
And our project is kind of screwed because we're unsure about so many things, including all the random details/facts...
It's feeling more and more like it's a one man project.
We were even thinking of asking if we could drop out of SSEF... even though we already got into the finals...
In the end we (I, actually) decided to continue on for SSEF and try to redeem our project... Hopefully it'll go well T_T
Our other judge was apparently busy so we didn't get judged by her (Dr Li) yet...
The person who barely contributed at all, apparently wrote on her blog about how she wasn't into research/science and all that and getting anxiety and shit like that.
WOW DO YOU THINK I LIKE DOING RESEARCH.
LIKE THAT GIVES YOU THE RIGHT TO NOT CONTRIBUTE TO YOUR OWN PROJECT.
(not to mention that this isn't the first time she's not contributing at all)
I wash my hands off this.
Rushed out the Nanao poster in 1 day and it turns out to be this haphazardly put together mass of photos... ._.
So glad i used InDesign for the ARP poster... Powerpoint is so laggy =.=
Joined the SIMC publishing team as a layout artist... but i don't think it'll be very fun...
I hope i don't regret this.
Maybe i should have just stuck to my own design projects.
Got back English AQ test and Math test...
Did surprisingly well for AQ LOL.
Math was okay... not satisfied but still happy with my results i guess.
Got tricked by the math mcqs and lost 2 marks >.>
I feel so stressed can.
It's like one big thing after another.
Research congress, Chem department judging, FIAA Japan trip interview, SSEF, March holidays where I will have to rush out all my projects...
I really can't stand this.
I'm completely unsuited for this school.
Saturday, February 22, 2014
#428: SKATEEEEE
I want to go ice skating so badly nowadays orz.
There's that $9.90 skate all day offer but we're not all free on the same day... and when we are, the rink closes early :((
Really tempted to take ice skating lessons but it's expensive... also tempted to get the 3-month student pass during the holidays so i can go skating all the timeeeee. You can skate max 4 hours a day, which normally costs $17.50 x 2 = $35... The student pass costs $107 for tertiary students... Totally worth it hahaha.
I really like ice skating but i can't imagine doing jumps so honestly i'd be happy just being comfortable on the ice haha.
I wonder if this is just a temporary thing though. Me wanting to go ice skating, that is.
Probably not. Idk.
I wonder if this is just a temporary thing though. Me wanting to go ice skating, that is.
Probably not. Idk.
Can't wait for research congress to be over!! and SSEF too...
Kind of don't want to present twice but if we win something and get Kino vouchers i don't mind hahaha.
Finally done with ARP poster, though there's still the presentation to prepare for... which i have no idea if it will go well because i suck at presenting, i don't think the other ARP member will present well too. And yeah the last one doesn't even know the project well -_-
Next week is gonna be horrendous.
I have to: Do up script for ARP presentation, do chem notes 7, study for chem quiz 5.1-6, work on Nanao poster, Math assignment 4...
Chem notes 7 is about equilibrium which sucks. Acid-base and solubility equilibrium is the worst!!
I feel so stressed wtf. And not to mention my groups haven't started on the Dev Bio presentation nor the Stats poster D:
Finally done with ARP poster, though there's still the presentation to prepare for... which i have no idea if it will go well because i suck at presenting, i don't think the other ARP member will present well too. And yeah the last one doesn't even know the project well -_-
Next week is gonna be horrendous.
I have to: Do up script for ARP presentation, do chem notes 7, study for chem quiz 5.1-6, work on Nanao poster, Math assignment 4...
Chem notes 7 is about equilibrium which sucks. Acid-base and solubility equilibrium is the worst!!
I feel so stressed wtf. And not to mention my groups haven't started on the Dev Bio presentation nor the Stats poster D:
And all of the projects are due after March holidays. March holidays are gonna suck.
Sian i really feel like a jack of all trades.
In terms of music: I play the piano, a bit of the guitar and violin. I want to learn the bass and drums.
I am artistically-inclined. I like graphic design, typography and photography.
I'm interested in psychology and linguistics.
I like Math. :p
Ice skating! (i think my balance is pretty good...)
I love Japan.
BUT I'M ONLY AVERAGE TO SLIGHTLY ABOVE AVERAGE IN ALL THOSE AREAS.
(except maybe Japanese language/culture. haha.)
Sian i really feel like a jack of all trades.
In terms of music: I play the piano, a bit of the guitar and violin. I want to learn the bass and drums.
I am artistically-inclined. I like graphic design, typography and photography.
I'm interested in psychology and linguistics.
I like Math. :p
Ice skating! (i think my balance is pretty good...)
I love Japan.
BUT I'M ONLY AVERAGE TO SLIGHTLY ABOVE AVERAGE IN ALL THOSE AREAS.
(except maybe Japanese language/culture. haha.)
Wednesday, February 19, 2014
#427
PE was horrible as usual... i survived 10 rounds though. 4km... that's like the furthest i've ever ran in my life =.=
2 days later and my thighs still hurt :(
Didn't have much of a headache though, which was good.
Math test wasn't bad... just made ridiculously stupid mistakes T~T
And here i was hoping for a full marks... ><
Chem quiz was surprisingly okay... better than the last one at least. Was told that it's quite hard by jy and Ms Wong haha...
Been rushing ARP poster like crazy these days...
I'm really tired of team mates who don't care about their own work.
Even small things like the birthday present system in our class, the person i was working together with didn't do what she said she would do, get a card and wrapping paper. In the end i had to buy (not very nice) wrapping paper from the Popular in school and wrap the present on the day of the celebration itself.
Is it so hard to care a little?
Okay, i think i myself am trying to distance myself from my emotions and trying not to care if not i will seriously just drown in an abyss of tears.
There's still Nanao poster argh. Mr Chu was saying how our poster is super overdue, but the email said 'please send the first draft by 28 Feb'?? =.=
Dude we still have ARP posters to work on in addition to all the projects and normal assignments, quizzes etc. I really don't mind doing a poster for the Nanao SEP to promote it, but seriously i need time gosh. (Nanao♥)
I think the biggest problem about uni is that i have absolutely no idea what to take as a major.
It'll be nice to be able to study the majors which i'm interested in (which you can't), but i can't choose between all my options, plus let's just say all of them aren't very good job options (i.e. low salary)
Probably will end up in NUS's Japanese Studies course... hopefully i can take other modules too, like psychology/linguistics... Heard from a friend that you can take other modules, but they should be from other faculties or something. It's so annoying, not knowing stuff you want and should know.
And i really like graphic design but i'm not sure if i'll really want to slug away everyday trying to produce pieces of work to fufill the curriculum... Guess design will just stay as a hobby.
I think i'll probably end up in a Japanese company or something if i take Japanese Studies haha.
Really excited for ice skating and the RADWIMPS concert!!
There's an offer for ice skating till 5th March at $9.90 for all day skating!! (though research congress and everything is preventing me from going every week haha)
And the details for the RADWIMPS concert was just released, only $78!!
Haven't been this hyped up since Nanao haha.
Saturday, February 15, 2014
#426
So i finally got a chance to ask my dad about his budget for my uni education.He sort of guessed that i was interested in a Japan uni, and he said 'i don't have the money for Japan lah. standard of living so high.'
My heart broke.
Guess i'm not gonna make it to Japan unless i get a scholarship or something.
Even then i have no idea if i can make it.
I don't know if it's just the heat of the moment, but i'm really, really upset hearing that i won't be able to get to Japan.
I teared.
We'll see.
But i won't be able to do anything tonight other than mope around being sad and depressed.
I wonder if i'll be satisfied with just travelling to Japan whenever i have the money to.
Partly why i'm so upset is also because my family goes for weekly dinners out.
My mum buys lots of crystals. My dad buys lots of books. That he doesn't touch and just stores in a whole freaking room.
And my mum was like, i'm working now, so just turn on the aircon if you need to.
And when i think of all that, i'll just tear up and think, 'i just want to make it to Japan'.
And there i was just stupidly researching about universities in Japan.
I want to cry.
I feel so weak.
I feel like i won't survive in this unforgiving society.
I am so freaking lost about everything right now i don't even.
I don't know what i want to study in uni.
I don't know which uni i want to study in.
I don't what the hell is gonna happen after i graduate, or even in this last high school year.
If i don't make it to Japan, i'll probably just take Japanese Studies in NUS... or something.
I want to disappear from this world.
Tuesday, February 11, 2014
#425: Raison D'etre
/rant below/...yesterday was absolutely horrible.
Math GT.
PE was 6 rounds of netball running, but i only managed to run 5 rounds so i just walked/jogged the last round... then 2 sets of 20 push ups and 20 crunches... He tried to teach us some weird non-contact rugby game but it failed so badly =.=
I didn't actually feel that bad after PE, or even during dev bio. But then a headache started before SLI and got worse. I don't know if it was cca that ended late or what, but i only reached Clementi mrt at like 7pm... and the bus ride there was absolutely horrible with all the annoying students chattering like crazy, tempting my head to explode. But the worse was when i was getting dinner at subway, i suddenly felt my appetite disappear and suddenly i felt really, really horrible. Yep. I almost couldn't even eat with that stupid horrible headache i seriously wanted to just crash right there and then. But i managed to finish my sandwich and just sipped a bit of drink before heading to the mrt. Mrt was horribly packed, as usual. I don't even have any expectations for mrt anymore. I really don't know how i'm gonna survive the mrt when i'm in uni or working. (On a side note why is my body so weak)
My headache somehow miraculously got a lot better once i reached home though, no idea why. It was even worse than the first PE session at Subway but was the least horrible when i got home??
Bio quiz wasn't /that/ bad but the questions were really quite different from the mock quiz we did which was last year's quiz... saw the answers for the first page after he collected our papers because he was demostrating the prac and i couldn't see so i was behind the teacher's bench haha...
Got the first page all correct! Hopefully i'll get an A...
Today was horrible.
Because of chem. All because of chem.
Screwed up chem quiz horribly so i'm praying i'll at least pass... Guess i'm not good at lewis structures and IMF...
And the assignment.
Today's session was particularly horrible.
It just felt like everyone was just chionging to finish their assignment on time (it was supposed to be due at the end of class) and people were copying =.= (even without understanding)
I really can't copy answers, unless i really understand. I was at the last page and there was this particular part that i didn't understand so i refused to copy the answer... But i copied it in the end and figured out the rest on my own. (the assignment ended up being due today, not necessarily at the end of class)
Took a photo of my own assignment to figure out later, and i think i've got it figured out, but i think i'll go see Ms Wong...
Why am i even taking AP Chem when it makes me want to cry.
Still don't know if i should take APs... should probably take since my CAP isn't that good... but the problem lies in whether i can get a 5 for chem =/
Can probably get a 5 for stats but chem is a different issue orz.
The current fave (:
The chorus is awesome. (if you understand Japanese)
Can't wait for them to perform live in Singapore in June!!
Sunday, February 9, 2014
#424: 迷う
Another week's gone, another week's starting.Tomorrow is likely to be the worst day in my life. (school life?)
Math GT in the morning, and then there's freaking PE, and a bio quiz. And CCA.
Having a bio quiz after PE which gives me a headache is killer can. Luckily (or not), the bio quiz is only a 20 MCQ quiz.
I'm seriously getting more and more lost on uni.
And there has been too many things to do recently.
Which leads to me being overwhelmed, again.
ARP poster, Nanao posters, the bunch of quizzes, projects, uni... just. argh.
I stumbled on a post about a Japan trip during 9-18 June conducted by FIAA for JC/Poly students.
And i REALLY want to go. But yet i'm worrying about stupid things like how i'm super picky about food.
There's an essay to write and i have to present my latest academic results though. Plus an interview in English :S
I wonder how many interviews i've gone for so far. Like, 1 or something? The one for that stationery shop.
Don't like interviews D:
Good luck surviving Monday, me.
Monday, February 3, 2014
#423
CNY was at a record high level of boredom man...
Seriously i was spamming Flappy Bird over cny =.=
We didn't have many snacks at home for cny either...
We had a single container of chiku chips which was finished in a single day xD
Somehow the angbao $$ is at a record high this year though, even if you exclude the 50 bucks from my older sis who's now married :D
And it didn't feel like there were more people, or that people gave more... weird. =/
Anyway, now that cny's over it's back to school time D:
Idk if it was a bad idea or not, to finish the next chapter of chem before cny haha...
I don't feel very familiar with the chapter now because i did it earlier, but i don't think i'd be able to concentrate and finish it over cny HAHA. Oh well.
Still have to study for chem quiz. :S
Was planning to go to Starbucks todady to mug, before dropping by Jem's Kino and having dinner... The mugging part didn't happen haha.
Oh yeah. Frozen was great. Was totally like a musical, like many people said.
I teared up during 'Do you wanna build a snowman?' and 'Let it go' orz.
I feel like Elsa.
I feel like i can't be myself.
Oh yes and i'd very much love to be somewhere cooler than Singapore -_-
We ate at Menya Musashi again though, couldn't find the other ramen shop in Star Vista LOL.
I need more good ramennnnnnnnnnn :D (... but $$$ orz)
I feel like eczema is making my life hard.
It seems like it's eczema which is making me can't tolerate the heat. (which i'm not 100% sure about but yeah)
I have terribly dry, peeling skin which looks horrible. I put moisturiser every night after i shower, but my skin is peeling /again/ in the morning argh.
And the eczema is so bad on my feet there are literal holes sometimes and i can't wear open footwear except when my feet is in a better condition...
It's not like i don't drink enough water D:
My feet are better nowadays though. Can wear wedges without my eczema being super obvious...
But my arms, thighs and even my stomach area is peeling like crazy T_T
Not to mention eczema ruined my nails. My nails are now short and ugly for life.
Why does my body have so many problems huh.
My heels hurt when walking in flats, even when it's only 1, 2 hours -_-
Gonna experiment a bit, wearing my 2" / 3.5" wedges out to see if my heels hurt as bad.
Wore the 2" wedges out once, and my heels only hurt a little even after standing on the mrt... maybe the 3.5" one will be perfect O.o
Just hope it won't be the balls of my feet that hurt lol.
My mum thinks it's Plantar Fasciitis, but my heels don't hurt when i get out of bed in the morning... they only hurt when i walk orz.